About Me: An Introduction to the Blogger

About Me:

This is a short story about myself so people know where I am coming from.

Being from a Hashemi tribe from my fathers side, I will go by the name of 'Hashem' and I hope that will not be an issue.

I wanted to share my different experiences with different groups and sects within Islam. I come from a, considered to be, 'religious' family. But their understanding was different of what it was to be "religious". I call it being culturally religious. I have been through both the typical Salafi vs Sufi phase of a seeker who wanted to rediscover their religion. Rediscovering ones religion is a positive yet somewhat a 'rare' phase a typical ignorant adolescent goes through in the West. My Lord, Allah, has blessed me with guidance on the path of Islam after being through different crowds. But nobody is not in proximity for any blessing from their Lord to let them start learning about their own selves.

I first had to interest to practice back when I first started middle school since my older biological sisters attended a convention in Toronto called, 'Reviving the Islamic Spirit - RIS' where many scholars from the tradition of Tasawwuf would come and give theoretical talks on the advancement of Muslims in the West, and globally. Not that there is anything wrong with giving theoretical talks as opposed to practical talks, the atmosphere is spiritually uplifting, but it was a typical conference where people would attend to have that Eman rush once again and try to maintain it. I always loved it and STILL do Alhamdulillah, but I always wanted something a little more beneficial with less people there and more contact with the speakers. I believe it was that year in 2007 or the following year in 7th grade in 2008 in the winter I went for the first time. (I'm sure it was 2007) I listened to my favorite speaker, Shaykh Hamza Yusuf. I didn't really understand half the things he was saying but I sure did feel good being in that gathering and hearing his voice. In my private Islamic school, I would love to quote him... little did I know the board of the school was from an opposing movement.

Time flew by.

8th grade. I was invited by a community friend to an Al-Maghrib class concerning salah. THAT was the type of classes and gathering I wanted to go to. An affordable class that I can learn from practical things in Fiqh. I was in that crowd for a while till 10th grade. But between this time, I was told by this group to stay away from certain influential figures in the community. Why? Because apparently they 'worshiped the Prophet' and 'made Dua TO him.' I never understood and I never listened to them. I later found out more that they were 'Salafis' and I slowly left their group. I went through, what I believe, a phase that was perhaps similar to the infamous 'Salafi Burnout' when I was sick and tired of some religious matters so I fell into the wrong crowds doing really haram things. Some time in 10th grade, I decided to learn more about Tasawwuf. But I didn't take action towards it. One night, as I was on the computer watching videos of gangs around the United States, on my YouTube feed came a video of Shaykh Hamza Yusuf called, "Real Knowledge - Very Emotional Lecture." I watched it and it changed my life, Alhamdulillah.

As months went by, I was still hooked on the wrong I was still doing. Until I left that crowd at the school, I stopped and I was able to practice better. The school itself I went to was a private Islamic school secretly and heedlessly teaching Wahhabism. The Islamic Studies teachers were not Wahhabis/ists but the rest of the teachers of greater authority were indirectly promoting 'Pure Islam' from Saudi Arabian publications of these recent times. After I left the school, I was able to learn more and more about Tasawwuf and what it really is. I went through a typical phase, trying to debate people and argue with them about random stuff, and about a year later towards the end of my 11th grade year, I realized that I have no authority to argue with people about anything. Arguments WILL happen, but you should never go out of your way to start one. The best thing to do is to walk away.

Even after I left the Salafi group, the 'students' of al Maghrib would still encourage me to come to their classes but very politely I would tell them that I cannot make it or I just cannot come. I never wanted to tell them off because some of them are actually nice people. Somebody from the crowd asked me, "Why don't you come to our gatherings while you still attend yours?" I asked him, "What do you mean?" He said, "Well.. you can still come to 'Salafi' (air quotes) gatherings and but still attend yours." I said, "Good idea... but why I don't I come to your 'Salafi' gathering and you can come to my 'Sufi' gatherings? Good idea?" He just said, "I'm not always sure if I can make them." I did not understand... Many of the people of Tasawwuf don't have a problem with the Salafi classes and gathering but they just feel uncomfortable around them because why would anybody want to be around people who consider them a Mushrik (polytheist)? At the same time, it doesn't matter what they think of me and I should do the right thing.

That's my story.

Open to simple questions.

w/s

Hashem (al-Maliki)